1. There is a chance that if you choose to breastfeed, you will no longer be able to eat anything that has any true redeeming quality due to a little phenomenon known as MSPI. Milk/Soy Protein Intolerance is apparently quite common yet I had never heard even a whispering of such things until Barrett's reflux became OOC. So, my diet currently consists of Jimmy Johns turkey subs, any variety of potato chip (sans any hint of cheddar or ranch goodness), diet caffeine free soda and meat. Yum. I've determined that my breaking point will most likely be 6 months without cheesy goodness and beer to wash down the cheesy goodness. Cheese is just so good and while I know that for Barrett, breast is best ... food is my friend.
2. It seems like every single preemie has reflux... spitting, burning, sucky reflux. I never knew it was so common and feel they should have warned me of such things before checking out of the hospital with the pre-prime bundle. Each morning and evening, we give Barrett his Prevacid and hold him upright for 30 minutes or more (unless he spits it up and has a red faced attack) prior to giving him his next meal. Holding him off for a half hour in the morning is similar to trying to block off the buffett at weight challenged (read: fat) camp. Feedings are a grab bag of sorts... some feedings, Barrett eats himself into a blissful state of euphoria and others, he screams his head off. As all things truly do, this too, shall pass but until then, the friendly burp cloth will remain a staple in my wardrobe.
3. Babies will nap only if they are on you. Even if you are not holding them snuggled up close to you, they can tell the difference between your legs and their crib. This phenomenon results in many an hour spent in front of the television and most of my adult convos beginning with "Today on Ellen...". I am actually not complaining about this because what it means is, Barrett will actually nap.
4. You will cry more out of fear that horrible things are happening to your baby than you ever have in your whole life. The amount of phone calls to Adam in the last two months that have been shadowed with screams in the background and tears in the foreground have been countless. My poor husband has heard the line "There is something wrong with our baby" repeatedly, to the point at which I believe he secretly thinks I am a lunatic. The day on which Barrett racked up nearly 6 hours straight of screamfilled moments, my eyes were nearly cried shut. With every shriek from Barrett's sweet little lips, my stomach aches for his. Although things are looking up with the day becoming less monopolized by double B's unease, I still find myself saddened each time his face is washed with alligator tears.
5. The faces and sounds that your baby makes when they are happy make every little piece of the puzzle come together as a parent. In one day, our split personality son can go from raging mad to cooing and gooing and these, these are the moments that are truly incredible. The still somewhat sleepless nights, the spit-up stained stuff, the house that is a little unkept ... all worth it for these moments.
So, Barrett is now over 7.5 pounds and is about 50/50 on happy days vs. crappy days. He sleeps for about 3 hours at a time at night, something people assure me is merely due to his petite frame and still shows up at Mama's Breastaurant every 2-3 hours during daylight. I am fortunate in that while I have to wake in the wee hours to feed the little squirt, Adam splits Barrett time ... Barrett bellies up to the booby buffett for 20-30 minutes and I hold him upright to rebel against the reflux for 10 minutes, then daddy dashes in to finish the festivities while I head back to dreamland. I must admit that the last 2 or so months have been so much of a blur but I know that life will find a new normal very soon. In the words of our good Dr. Dek... Barrett will never remember any of this, and we will never forget it.
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